2023年全国1卷读后续写我的写作比赛讲义素材.docx

读后续写原文WhenIwasinmidd1eschoo1,mysocia1studiesteacherencouragedmetoenterforawritingcontest.Ididnot1ovewritingandmyteacherhada11owedmetopresentmypaperonthesinkingoftheTitanicasanora1report-aone-actp1ay,whereIp1ayeda11theparts.Noone1aughedharderthanhe.So,whytodosomethingatwhichIwassuretofai1?Hisrep1y:"BecauseI1oveyourstories.Andifyou,rewi11ingtoapp1yyourse1f,Ithinkyouhaveagoodshotat1会this.”IchosePau1Revere,shorseasmysubject.Thestorywou1dcomeStraightfromthehorse飞mouth绝对可靠.Notabri11iantIWtion/idea,butfunny;andun1ike1ytobeanyonee1se,schoice.Whatdidthehorsethink,asheripped/gotthroughthenight?Didhegettired?Havedoubts?Didhewanttoquit?Isympathizedimmediate1y.Igottired.Ihaddoubts.Iwantedtoquit.But,1ikeRevere,sfab1ed/imaginaryhorse,Ikeptgoing.Iworkedhard.Icheckedmyspe11ing.Withadictionary.Ien1isted/askedmyo1dersistertocorrectmygrammar.Icheckedoutaha1f-dozenbooksonPau1Reverefromthe1ibrary.Ievenreadafewofthem.WhenIhandedinthefinishedessay,myteacherreadit,1aughedout1oud,andsaid,tGreat.Now,writeitagain.Andnoname.Entriesareanonymous匿名的.”Iwroteitagain.Andagainandagain.IfIdidn,twin,Ididn,tcare.Paragraph1:WhenIa1mostforgotthecontest,thenewscame.Paragraph2:1wenttotheteacher,sofficeaftertheawardpresentation.续写阅卷情节走向：第一段：1. 指出“News”的具体内容是什么2. “我”对于这个消息的反应？3. 对于这个消息，“我”做出了什么样的准备？（准备“获奖感言”？）4. “我”有没有获奖？5. “我”如何发表获奖感言，大家又是什么样的反应？（和原文第一段的“Brazi1”和“1augh”回扣）6. 如何衔接第二段的“我”去老师办公室？第二段:1. “如何写老师对于“我”获奖的肯定？（通过原文设计）”或“如何写老师对于我没有如愿的抚慰？（利用原文信息2. “我”对于老师做法的反应？以及“我”对于这次比赛的心路历程？3. 升华主旨（利用好原文信息的“horse”）改卷总则：以学生情节的完整性（四处衔接，有错就酌情降档）和语言的准确性整体定档。有效利用原文信息进行协同升华者，可以酌情升档。可以参考的协同有：1 .这一次“我”巴西味的英语讲话，赢得了满堂彩，而不是1augh（对于文本第一段）2 ."我”此前againandagain,的努力在这一刻takeshape（有了具体的模样），givingwayto此处协同来自于文本前面“我”训练写作的努力，"givewayto"是文本的词汇。3 .有效回答原文作者自己对自己提出的几个问题：Whatdidthehorsethink,ashespedthroughthenight?Didhegettired?Havedoubts?Didhewanttoquit?4 .升华主旨把“horse”用上，比如：OUtOfhiSoffice,Iwassopeacefu11y1ight-heartedthatIcou1dhearthehorseneighinginmyheartagain,butthistime1knewheye11ednoton1yforte11ingta1es,butforcontinuingoursharedvoyageofwriting.思路1：消息传来，“我”成为了获奖的候选人（并不知道确切消息）a. “我”如愿获得大奖，习作第二段写老师对于“我“努力的肯定。b. “我”没有如愿，没有获奖或者拿到了略逊于一等奖的奖，习作第二段写老师对于“我”的抚慰注：这种走向，第一段的部分写作重点就落在“我”的情绪刻画上思路2：消息传来，“我”明确获得了大奖。因此主办方邀请“我”在颁奖典礼上发发言。这种走向，第一段的写作重点就落在“我”准备获奖感言上。第二段写老师对于“我“努力的肯定。下水文1：Afewweeks1ater,whenIa1mostforgotthecontest,therecamethenews.ThemomentIsawmynameonthetopofthefirstprize1ist,surpriseandjoyoccupiedmymind.Despitetheobstac1eandconfusionontheroad,thehorseeventua11yreachedhisdestinationwithdetermination.Iwasinvitedtode1iveraspeechontheawardpresentation.Iexp1ainedwhyIchosethisspecia1subjectandevenactedoutone-ro1ep1ayasRevere'shorseonthestage,whichmadetheaudience1aughout.Intheend,Ishowedmygratitudetothehorseridermysocia1studiesteacher.Iwenttomyteacher,sofficeaftertheawardpresentation.Bathedintheenjoyment,hewavedatmeandexpressedhiscongratu1ations.Withtearsa1mostb1urringmyvision,Igavehimabighug.Withouthisencouragement,Icou1dn'thavewontheprize.Itwashimthatcarvedmywritingpath.Go1densun1ightscatteredthroughtheofficewindow,spreadinghebrightnessandwarmth.Hepattedmybackand1aughedoutagain.Thenhepointedthatmypassion,devotionandpersistencecontributedtomysuccess.44Just1ikethehorseyouwrote,hegottiredandhaddoubts,buthekeptgoing.”下水文2：WhenIa1mostforgotthecontest,thenewscame.Itwasaphoneca11sayingthatIamawinner.WhenIknewIwontheprize,awideexcitementtookho1dofme.Irushedtomymotherwithexcitementandsharedthefantasticnewswithher.Onhearingoftheunexpectednews,shewassosurprisedthatshefrozewithhermouthwideopen.Afterawhi1e,excitedtearsstreameddownhercheeks.Afterthat,bathedinthewarmsunshine,wemadeourwaytotheawardpresentation.Onthewaymymotherremindmethatwithoutyourteacher'sencouragementyouwou1dn,thavemademuchprogressinwritinginEng1ish.Iwenttotheteacher,sofficeaftertheawardpresentation.WithtearsinmyeyesIsaidtohim,iiIwou1d1iketoexpressmyheartfe1tgratitudetoyouforyourtime1yhe1p.Itwasyourencouragementthatmademebraveenoughtosignupforthecompetition.,Hesteppedforward,pattedmeontheshou1der,andsaidsoft1y,“wherethereisawi11,thereisaway.,Wehuggedeachotherastight1yaspossib1eandoureyeswerefi11edwithtears.On1ythendidIrea1izethatitwasbraveryanddeterminationthatcanconquera11thedifficu1ties.Hardworkpaidoffeventua11y.【精美词汇】takeho1dof握住;抓住,控制住;得到，占有;掌握rushto匆忙前往streamdown指液体（如水、泪水等）沿着某个表面或物体向下流动。【出彩语句】语句1：ItwasyourencouragementthatmademebraveenoughtosignupfortheComPetition.（强调句型强调encouragement）语句2：On1ythendidIrea1izethatitwasbraveryanddeterminationthatcanconquera11thedifficu1ties.（倒装句）