应用文精批精改6(课堂讲稿)教师版.docx

应用文精批精改6:演讲稿（课堂讲稿）题目展示：假定你是李华,你将参加一个以“Live a Green Life”为主题的英语演讲活动,现需写一篇英语演讲稿。内容包括：1 .“绿色生活”的意义和方式 2 .发出号召。注意：L写作词数应为80左右；2.请按如下格式在答题卡的相应位置作答.审题“三步走”一审文体:演讲稿二数要点:三个：“绿色生活”的意义“绿色生活”的方式发出号召。三.思时态与人称：时态一般现在时人称一第一人称绿色生活相关表达：1 .global warming 全球变暖2 .solar energy 太阳能3 .deal with rubbish properly 正确处理垃圾4 .do great harm to our daily life对我们的日常生活非常有害5 .raise one,s environmental awareness 提高环保意识6 .make proper use of water resources 合理禾!用水资源7 .save and treasure our resources节约并珍惜我们的资源8 .keep the balance of nature 保持生态平衡9 .pay close attention to 密切注意10 .make an effort to do sth.努力做某事1 l.take action/steps/measures to do Sth.采取措施做某事12 .prevent.from .阻止13 .take responsibility for/be responsible for .对.负责任14 .call on/appeal to sb.to do sth.号召/呼吁某人做某事15 .have an effect/influence on .对.产生影响16 .recycle textbooks 回收利用课本17 .ban the abuse of plastic bags 禁止滥用塑料袋18 .protect the surroundings 保护周围环境19 .With the number of cars increasing fast in our city, our environment is getting increasingly worse.在我们的城市,随着汽车数量的快速增长,我们的环境正急剧恶化。20 .Accordingly/Consequently,.it is not difficult to draw the conclusion that people are more andmore aware of the importance of the protection of the environment.因此,不难得出结论:人们越来越意识到环境保护的重要性了。21 .How important and necessary for us to keep the balance of nature and protect the environment!对于我们来说,保持生态平衡、保护环境是多么重要和必要啊!学生作品展示：LadieS an。GCrlt)。GChf朋Cf胸消。"匕 片四:RivM蚂Zd 伪 勺仅rd 柩花二江惊q济nq玄 秋式»2好 gygeu叶勿tc(Knq ch the mPiC we a ar找H HfeM.记用砥磔M *彷e w/斤都力沆“冲:肠化力 触部治 血让 痴尸力成女方而丈版.前"即仅峋 了浓八M夕 前W“负9血丽wwe.约以d tte尸咻苒七斤?叫怙丁胭响F 好夕才5斤优 勿勿/说卯/我:才S加. 寸沱阴q>or汝伽fpram可机去For希曲i芮优丁仞蚊为不加伊1佻噫叶制区POrMiPXicq沌武羊片呢Itrf哼衍物r也2re洲%仃；硒t .次锚q泞。座佗四批包G演仅明文他WStIr决反。或d幽: 。池磔阳闭父啪汗t-襁廿即S tMte反ctf翻版闻玄P wWcutd- -耐加 Tr次阴2诧如EwFrthf丁卬孙也HT冲陛沆再加CqfLt-WitT-tK4Wt什- -第一段:简单介绍+发言主题1. My name is Li Hua.Privileged to stand here,I am going to deliver my speech featuring on the topic ,Live a Green Life” .Li Hua的后面可以增加同位语,亮明演讲者的身份,也可起到丰富语法结构的作用;featuring 一 般用于描述某个人、物或事件的特色,而不是用于描述演讲的主题;topic后需加上介词。£ T修改提升:My name is Li Hua, a student from Grade 3.Privileged to stand before youtoday,I am going to deliver my speech on the topic of nLiving a Green Life.f 其它写法 l：Good afternoon! I feel greatly honored to be here, sharing my ideas abou aLiving a Green Lifen.一其它写法 2:My name is Li Hua.It is a great privilege for me to stand here and deliver a speech on the subject of nLiving a Green Life.一其它写法 3：r m glad to be here today to share my thoughts on living a green life. 第二段正文:意义+方式2. Green is the colour of nature,which suggests that our life routine should be environmentally friendly and SUStainable,so we could better protect the nature and grant ourselves a cleaner world.属于“绿色生活”的意义部分;be environmentally friendly and SUStainable这个系表结构改 为动词短语 adopt an environmentally friendly and sustainable HfeStyIe（动宾结构）效果更 好;grant有点奇怪,建议改成provide或create;so改为so that "以便;为了"，前后逻辑关系 更恰当。T修改提升:Green is the colour of nature, which suggests that / suggesting that we should adopt an environmentally friendly and sustainable lifestyle, so that we can better protect the environment and create a cleaner world for ourselves.其它写法 1：Green, being the color of nature, implies that we need to embrace （拥抱）a lifestyle that is environmentally sustainable and friendly in order to SafegUard（保护） our planet and create a cleaner world for ourselves.f 其它写法 2:The color green, which is symbolic of nature, indicates the importance of adopting an environmentally friendly and sustainable lifestyle, in order to safeguard the environment and generate a cleaner world for ourselves.3. To realize lifestyle,we may change our way in every aspects,ranging from transportation to daily foods.属于“绿色生活”的方式部分;every aspect不需要加“sVrangiiig”可以不加，因为“every aspect"已经表达了 “在各个方面”之意,如果前面是in various aspects,那么ranging就需要 了。T基本修改:TO realize/achieve a healthier lifestyle, we may need to make changes in various aspects, ranging from transportation to daily foods.T修改提升:AChieVing a healthier lifestyle requires us to make changes in every aspect of our lives, from our modes of transportation to the foods we consume on a daily basis.4. For instance,taking public transportation is great for cutting down carbon emission,and using more recycleable bags helps to deal with plastic pollution.符合先笼统后具体的写作逻辑;在CUtting down后面加上on,以使句子更准确;recycleable改 为recyclable;tackle代替deal with,因为tackle更加强调采取措施应对这种问题。T修改提升:FOr instance, taking public transportation is great for cutting down on carbon emissions, and using more reusable/recylable bags helps tackle plastic pollution.一其它写法:PUbliC transportation is a great option for lowering carbon emissions, and employing more recyclable bags is an effective approach to addressing plastic pollution.第三段:简单致谢+重申主题5. One person, S effort matters little but if added up we could make a difference to this world.前面的主语